You are a successful, highly capable woman who is the family's primary breadwinner, with two young kids and a big job at HP. And your health goes south, fast.
"I started having debilitating anxiety attacks, ones I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. The attacks were like a buzz saw going off in your ear; you canít ignore it, or function." Deb couldn't sleep at night, or eat. Her weight dropped from 120 to 100 pounds. But she still wanted to keep working - she had to support her family, she had responsibilities at work.
A physician she trusted encouraged Deb to give herself time to heal. Uncharacteristically for him, Debís brother was more blunt; he said she had to stop working, or die. She worked up the courage to take a leave of absence. For a few months she slept eighteen hours a day.
During this period, she says, "Others were holding my hope.î By this beautiful phrase, she means that her husband and her friends stepped in to remain optimistic about her future, even though at the time Deb could not herself do so.
"It was a big secret I was struggling. One weekend my husband had to intervene. He got on the phone and said my wife needs a doctor, this weekend. I was having a really big anxiety attack.
"Over the weeks that followed, my husband remembers feeding me lots of milkshakes and getting me to the doctor. So many people helped me. I was beyond asking for help."